"I'll stand kind of pushed, kind of bent, on this heavy land."

[nausicaa83]

Time for the weird phonecall of the day.

Me: So I finally got that letter from the hospital with an appointment for the hpv test. They send it to all women, but I'm going to cancel my appointment.
My Aunt: Why?
Me: Well, it's a virus, it's cervical cancer, so it's like the one type of cancer I'm sure I cannot get.
Aunt: Because it's a virus?
Me: And given my current relationship status, there's no possibily of contracting anything sex-related, you got to accentuate the positive. My uterus stays safe and sound.
Aunt: Don't forget you could get infected and get stomach cancer, you know, through oral sex.
Me: AUNTIE!!!

I sometimes forget my aunt and my mom are very similar in many aspects, like the way they've always been completely at ease discussing sex in gruesome details with me. This one was quite bland, but I can remember a couple of conversations that still have me blushing up to my ears. The funniest part is that my aunt doesn't even understand why I'm embarassed. ^^"

Comments

[space-oddity-75.livejournal.com]

Bwahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Madreh = WIN!!!

[florealpolla.livejournal.com]

Eh, ma io sono rimasta tipo 20 secondi ammutolita, pensando: e ora come glielo dico senza traumatizzarla? XD

[nausicaa83.livejournal.com]

Quando devo spiegare le meccaniche, ho sempre questa parte matta del mio cervello che si sintonizza sull'Hokey Pokey (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QfPg_GzC-HA). You put your right foot in, you put your right foot out, you put your right foot in and shake it all about... XD